Chandler: (To Ross) How'd the thing go tonight, Ross?
Ross: Oh, it was, nah, well...
Rachel: What thing? What is this thing?
Ross: I was kinda supposed to be on TV tonight for The Discovery Channel.
Rachel: Oh, my God!
Ross: Yeah.
Rachel: Ross, why didn't you tell me that?
Ross: Eh, 'cause I knew that if I told you, you'd make me go, and I knew you needed someone to be with you tonight. Come on. Come on.
Rachel: I cannot believe you.
Ross: What?
Rachel: That is the sweetest thing, I just... (they stare at each other)
Ross: (breaking the silence) You should get some sleep.
Rachel: Okay.

Ross: Rach, you know, I can see you naked anytime I want.
Rachel: What?
Ross: All I have to do is close my eyes. See? (Ross closes his eyes) Woo-hoo!
Rachel: Ross, stop that!
Ross: I'm sorry.
Rachel: Come on! I don't want you thinking of me like that anymore.
Ross: Uh, sorry. Nothing you can do about it. It's one of my, uh, rights as the ex-boyfriend. (Ross closes his eyes again) Oh yeah!
Rachel: Stop it! Cut it out! Cut it out!
Ross: Okay, okay. I'm sorry. It will never happen-- (Closes eyes again) Uh oh. Wait a minute! Wait, wait. Now there are a hundred of you, and I'm the king!

Ross: Monica, Dad called this morning and, uh, Aunt Sylvia passed away.
Monica: (Pause) Yes! Yes! Yeah, yeah, yeah!
Ross: We were all pretty shaken up about it.

Phoebe: A house for dolls. That is so cool! When I was a kid I had a barrel.
Joey: Uh, Pheebs, you had a barrel for a doll house?
Phoebe: No, just a barrel.

Chandler: I'm telling ya, Joanna's got it all wrong. Okay? All I said was, "This was fun. Let's do it again sometime. I'll give you a call."
Rachel: Oh, gee. I wonder why she thinks you're going to call her?
Chandler: That's what you say at the end of a date.
Rachel: You can't just say, "Nice to meet you. Good night?"
Chandler: To her face?

Ross: Uh, Pheebs, while we're hovering around the subject. I just have to say dinosaurs, they, they don't go "ruff!"
Phoebe: The little ones do.

Like what she saw, huh? Dug my action, did she? Checking out the Chan Chan man!

Chandler

(Seeing Phoebe's doll house blow bubbles) Hey, my father's house does that.

Chandler

Chandler: Wait a minute. You're telling me this actress person is the only woman you ever wanted who didn't want you back?
Joey: Yeah. Oh, my God. Is this what it's like to be you?

Ross: Wait a minute. The house is built on radioactive waste and an ancient Indian burial ground? That would never happen.
Phoebe: Okay, you obviously don't know anything about the U.S. government.

Kate: He happens to be brilliant, which is more than I can say about that sweater you're dating.
Joey: Hey, I'm not interested in her sweater, alright? It's what underneath her sweater that counts.

Monica: Come on Rach. When a guy says he's going to call, it doesn't mean he's going to call. This never happened to you?
Rachel: Well, they always called.
Monica: Hm, bite me.

Friends Quotes

Rachel: Daddy! Daddy listen to me! It's like all my life everyone's told me, "You're a shoe! You're a shoe! You're a shoe!" Well, what if I don't want to be a shoe? What if I wanna be a purse or a hat? No I don't want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying I am a hat. It's a metaphor Daddy!
Ross: You can see where he'd have trouble.

Rachel: Julie! Julie, isn't that great? I mean, isn't that just kick-you-in-the-crotch, spit-on-your-neck fantastic?
Monica: (To Julie) It's an expression.