Ross: (About Rachel's makeup) Okay, there you go.
Rachel: (Looks in the mirror) Sure. Sure, I'll just sit next to the transsexual from purchasing.

Chandler: Now you stay out here and you think about what you did!
Ross: That's a duck.
Chandler: That's a bad duck!

This has been my dream ever since I got my first Easy Bake Oven and opened "Easy Monica's Bakery."

Monica

Phoebe: Do you guys know anything about chicks?
Chandler: Fowl? No. Women? No.

Phoebe: I have to tell you something?
Monica: What?
Phoebe: I can't tell you.
Monica: Well, wouldn't it be easier if you could tell me?
Phoebe: Yeah, in a perfect world.

Monica: Can you believe he just offered me a restaurant?
Rachel: What a bitch. I'm gonna kick his ass.

(To Ross and Rachel) Do you guys know how to get a chick out of a VCR?!

Chandler

Monica: (To Phoebe) Does it involve clogs?
Phoebe: Wait, clogs or claws?
Monica: Clogs.
Phoebe: No.
Monica: Claws?
Phoebe: No.

Rachel: Okay, you'd tell me the truth, right?
Ross: Rach, you can't look fat in an x-ray.

Ross: (Entering the apartment wearing a white suit with a little red bow tie) Hey, you guys! Guess what?
Rachel: Got a job on a river boat?
Ross: You know what? I didn't wear this suit for a year because you hated it. Well, guess what? You're not my girlfriend anymore, so...
Rachel: Oh I see, so this suit is making a point.
Ross: Right.
Rachel: Now that you're on you're own, you're free to look as stupid as you like.

Chandler: (To Ross) How'd the thing go tonight, Ross?
Ross: Oh, it was, nah, well...
Rachel: What thing? What is this thing?
Ross: I was kinda supposed to be on TV tonight for The Discovery Channel.
Rachel: Oh, my God!
Ross: Yeah.
Rachel: Ross, why didn't you tell me that?
Ross: Eh, 'cause I knew that if I told you, you'd make me go, and I knew you needed someone to be with you tonight. Come on. Come on.
Rachel: I cannot believe you.
Ross: What?
Rachel: That is the sweetest thing, I just... (they stare at each other)
Ross: (breaking the silence) You should get some sleep.
Rachel: Okay.

Chandler: So, um, after you put the suggestion in the box, how long did it take for the roller skating thing to happen?
Phoebe: Um, about three months.
Chandler: Okay, so I guess that's about two weeks before the topless thing kicks in.

Friends Quotes

Rachel: Daddy! Daddy listen to me! It's like all my life everyone's told me, "You're a shoe! You're a shoe! You're a shoe!" Well, what if I don't want to be a shoe? What if I wanna be a purse or a hat? No I don't want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying I am a hat. It's a metaphor Daddy!
Ross: You can see where he'd have trouble.

Rachel: Julie! Julie, isn't that great? I mean, isn't that just kick-you-in-the-crotch, spit-on-your-neck fantastic?
Monica: (To Julie) It's an expression.