Ross: I'm telling you, this guy Rachel is with is crazy! Okay? He viciously screamed at total strangers! I think he's bad news!
Chandler: Wait a minute, wait a minute, you don't like the guy Rachel's dating? Well, (Sarcastically) that's odd.

Director: (Reading a review of the play) "Joey Tribbiani gave an uneven performance as the lead, Victor. However Mr. Tribbiani was not the worst part of this production."
Joey: Yes!!!

Rachel: Oh, Phoebe, are you still on hold? I was supposed to call my Dad back like two hours ago.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, he clipped on. He said call him as soon as you get a chance, he's at Flimby's.
Rachel: What's Flimby's?
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, that's the word I use when I can't remember the real thing.

Joey: I don't get you, Kate. First you hate me, then you sleep with me, then you want nothing to do with me, and now you want me again?
Kate: What, you've never dated an actress before?

Joey: So, so, what'd you think?
Chandler: Almost as good as that play with the two naked girls on the see-saw.
Joey: I, I wasn't in that.
Chandler: I know.

(To Tommy) Step away from the duck.

Chandler

I've kept myself busy. (Monica and Rachel go in their rooms and walk right back out) I put your stuff in her room and her stuff in your room.

Phoebe

Chandler: (Entering, carrying the chick and duck) Hey! Can you take a duck and a chick to the theater?
Monica: Of course not.
Phoebe: No.
Chandler: Okay. I just wanted them to hear it from somebody else.

Rachel: You can either go or help me.
Ross: Okay, I'll go.
Rachel: Okay, but before you go, can you help me?

Monica: Okay, here's the thing.
Pete: The thing! Oh no, I hate the thing. What's the thing?

Ross: (About Rachel's makeup) Okay, there you go.
Rachel: (Looks in the mirror) Sure. Sure, I'll just sit next to the transsexual from purchasing.

(To the chick) That's Yasmine Bleeth. She's a different kind of chick.

Chandler

Friends Quotes

Rachel: Daddy! Daddy listen to me! It's like all my life everyone's told me, "You're a shoe! You're a shoe! You're a shoe!" Well, what if I don't want to be a shoe? What if I wanna be a purse or a hat? No I don't want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying I am a hat. It's a metaphor Daddy!
Ross: You can see where he'd have trouble.

Casting Director: Name?
Joey: Holden McGroin.