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Monica: What's "PLEH?"
Joey: That's help spelled backwards so that the helicopters can read it from the air!
Monica: Ah...what's doofus spelled backwards?

Joey: Smokey Joe here got half way to the highway and collapsed.
Chandler: I have the lung capacity of a two year old. (Starts to light another cigarette)
Monica: Then why are you smoking?
Chandler: Well it's very unsettling.

Phoebe: There is no smoking in my grandmother's cab.
Chandler: In that case, I have to go to the bathroom.

Ross: Forget it, no one's staying.
Chandler: Okay, then I might as well offer to stay.

Rachel: Oh my god! Chandler, you're smoking again.
Chandler: Shut up, you're not my real mom!

Phoebe: I had a dream last night that Rachel and Ross were still together and we were all here hanging out.
Joey: I had the same dream.
Phoebe: Yeah, and no one slept with the Xerox girl.
Joey: Oh, I had the opposite dream.

Joey: (To Chandler and Monica) Hey, does anybody else feel bad about Ross?
Monica: Why? Do you think he's still mad at us?
Chandler: (To Joey) Well, he's probably mad after you called him this morning to borrow his goggles.
Joey: What? Mine aren't tinted.

Monica: Guys. I thought you were taking Ross to the game.
Chandler: We are. He's meeting us here.
Monica: No! Rachel is meeting us here.
Phoebe: Oh come on, they can be in the same room.
Joey: Yeah, you should have been there last night.
Phoebe: Why? What happened now?
Joey: Well Ross was hanging out over at our place, Rachel comes over to borrow some moisturizer from Chandler...
Chandler: Yeah you, how hard is it to say "something?" Rachel came over to borrow "something."

Joey: Hey, can you close that window Chandler? My nipples could cut glass over here.
Phoebe: Really? Mine get me out of tickets!

Joey: You're smoking again?!
Chandler: Well, actually, yesterday I was smoking again. Today, I'm, I'm smoking still.

Phoebe: What town are we near?
Monica: Freemont! Westmont! Westburgh!
Phoebe: Okay, why are you answering?

Joey: (Trying to unlock the car) Relax okay? I, I, I can get this open. Anybody have a coat hanger?
Chandler: Oh, I do! Uh, no, wait a minute, I took it out of my shirt when I put it on this morning.
Monica: So, if you're parents hadn't got divorced, you'd be able to answer a question like a normal person?

Displaying quotes 121 - 132 of 1265 in total

Friends Quotes

Phoebe: Okay, Joey, your bet.
Joey: I fold like a cheap hooker who got hit in the stomach by a fat guy with sores on his face. (The girls look at him, confused.) Oh, I'm out.

Ross: Rach, you know, I can see you naked anytime I want.
Rachel: What?
Ross: All I have to do is close my eyes. See? (Ross closes his eyes) Woo-hoo!
Rachel: Ross, stop that!
Ross: I'm sorry.
Rachel: Come on! I don't want you thinking of me like that anymore.
Ross: Uh, sorry. Nothing you can do about it. It's one of my, uh, rights as the ex-boyfriend. (Ross closes his eyes again) Oh yeah!
Rachel: Stop it! Cut it out! Cut it out!
Ross: Okay, okay. I'm sorry. It will never happen-- (Closes eyes again) Uh oh. Wait a minute! Wait, wait. Now there are a hundred of you, and I'm the king!

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