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Curb Your Enthusiasm

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Curb Your Enthusiasm Season 3 Quotes (Page 2)

Season 3 Episode 7: "The Corpse Sniffing Dog"

Bald Chef: You have to wear a hat if you're gonna be in a convertible, then you look like you're trying to hide something.
Larry: Well, that's what they do, these guys with the hats. Don't they?
Bald Chef: Yeah, Yeah!
Larry: They wear it all the time and they'll meet a girl or something, then they'll show up on a date. What are they gonna do? Are they gonna take the hat off? Wear it? They have a terrible decision.
Bald Chef: Right, then the girl is going to be like, "I didn't know you were bald."
Larry: Yeah, "You misrepresented yourself!"
• Rating: Unrated

Larry: (seeing Stu taste wine) He's like an elephant sticking his head in a pond.
• Rating: Unrated

Susan: You going to thank me too?
Cheryl: And thank you Susan
Susan: You're welcome (looks to Larry)
Larry: What? Why do I have to thank you?
Susan: For dinner, that my husband and I treated you to.
Larry: Oh, I thought he treated me to it.
Susan: Stu pulled out the credit card and put it down, yes.
Larry: Yeah, so I thanked him
Susan: And he's using our money to pay for it, so you could thank us. We're taking you out to dinner.
Larry: Well, you could call it "our money," but just for the sake of discussion, he's the one who goes to work and earns the money. You don't work.
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Larry: You know me, I don't like to complain.
• Rating: Unrated

Jeff: So you have to decide between whether you want Daddy, or Oscar.
Sammy: Mmm...Oscar!
Jeff: No, no. Whay I'm saying is, that if you say Oscar, Daddy won't be here.
Sammy: I know.
Jeff: You know?
Sammy: (nodding) Mmhum
Jeff: But you're choosing Oscar. I'm your Dad.
Sammy: I just love that dog.
• Rating: Unrated

Jeff: A dog! She chose a f**king dog over her own father.
Larry: You sat down and you laid it out?
Jeff: I talked to her. I told her, 'Daddy's sick. He can't stay in the same house with Oscar.' She wants Oscar! She wants the dog!
Larry: Calm down
Jeff: Where is the dog?!
Larry: They took him back to your house.
Jeff: My house? No, no, no, his house. His house. I'm at the W hotel. It's his house now.
• Rating: Unrated

Season 3 Episode 6: "The Special Section"

Larry: My mother had a tattoo on her ass?
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Andy: You missed a good one. This was a really nice...
Larry: I'm sorry I missed it. Perhaps had I been notified, I may have been able to attend my mother's funeral.
• Rating: Unrated

Larry: (reading from condolence book) "Beautiful service. Sorry about your loss. Where's Larry?"
• Rating: Unrated

Larry: I changed my mind. I'd like to get it back.
Richard Lewis: You can't be an East Indian-giver.
• Rating: Unrated

Season 3 Episode 5: "The Terrorist Attack"

Wanda: I thought I'd never say this, but Larry is right.
• Rating: Unrated

Larry: When you said "Mr. Duplicity" I naturally thought you were referring to me.
• Rating: Unrated

Wanda: Why don't we call the terrorists and ask them could they pick another weekend that's more suited for you?
• Rating: Unrated

Stu: Have a bite with the Reisers.
Larry: At least they pick up a check every now and then!
• Rating: Unrated

Cheryl: I'm acting like I'm not thrilled to be sitting here with you, but I am just out of my mind right now.
Larry: I've been urinating all day.
Alanis: Really? That's the effect I often have on people.
• Rating: Unrated

Season 3 Episode 4: "The Nanny from Hell"

Larry: Going to his pool party?
Jeff: Yeah I am. Yeah I am.
Larry: Wearing a bathing suit? Going swimming?
Jeff: Speedo!
• Rating: Unrated

Jeff: It's like eating a delicious sponge!
• Rating: Unrated

Larry: (noticing a child's enormous penis) What's going on with this kid?
Susie: Ahhh!
Jeff: Wow!
Cheryl: Honestly, it's huge.
• Rating: Unrated