Heather: You’re here! How long will you be here?
Valencia: The rest of the series. Of holidays, I mean.

Heather: Also using your sexual fluidity as a red herring? Baller move.
Valencia: My pronouns tracked, that was you. Check your assumptions.

You’re a great replacement for Brendan. A great listener and you didn’t ruin my vagina.


It’s because I’m drunk and sad and I want you to stop pointing at women.


We have seasons in LA. T-shirt, sweatshirt, puffer and tank top.


That’s Jason, I’ve been on a date with him. He had these greasy smelly balls.


What? You think I don’t have a google alert for Rebecca Bunch? You think that I’m not reading the comments section of the Daily Covina?


Want a doughnut? I told the man to put the most fattening ones in there.


How was everyone’s weekend? I went to a pumpkin patch with my mom. She was a little surprised by the invite but I have a cute photo.


I was at Kate Middleton’s wedding and we barely speak anymore.


Doing baby laundry makes me want to cry.


Here is your burger and cabbage. They call it the No One Wants That.


Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Quotes

Rebecca: Where are you from again?
Josh: West Covina, California. 91791!
Rebecca: West Covina, I remember that. That's near the beach, right?
Josh: Yeah, only two hours...well, four in traffic.

Dear God, I don't pray to you because I believe in science. But I don't know what to do. Give me guidance, please. Ah-men. A-men. Amen?

Rebecca Bunch