Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season 2 Episode 2: "Some Assembly Required" Quotes
Cordelia: Xander, I just wanted to thank you for saving my life. What you did in there was really brave and heroic, and I just wanted to tell you if there's anything I could ever do to...
Xander: Do you mind? We're talking here. So, where were we?
[Cordelia walks away shocked]
Willow: Wondering why we never get dates.
Xander: Yeah. So, why do you think that is?
Angel: What I saw didn't add up to three whole girls. I think they kept some parts.
Buffy: Could this get yuckier?
Willow: They probably kept the other parts to eat.
Buffy: Question answered.
Xander: You know, this might go a lot faster if you femmes actually picked up a shovel, too.
Giles: Hear, hear.
Buffy: Sorry, but I'm an old-fashioned gal. I was raised to believe that men dig up the corpses and the women have the babies.
Cordelia: Darn, I have cheerleader practice tonight. Boy, I wish I knew you were gonna be digging up dead people sooner, I would've canceled.
Xander: All right, but if you come across the army of zombies, can you page us before they eat your flesh?
[Cordelia leaves the library]
Giles: Zombies don't eat the flesh of the living.
Xander: Yeah, I knew that. But did you see the look on her face?
Buffy: Are you jealous?
Angel: Of Xander? Please. He's just a kid.
Buffy: Is it because I danced with him?
Angel: “Danced with” is a pretty loose term. “Mated with” might be a little closer.
Buffy: Don't you think you're being a little unfair? It was one little dance which I only did to make you crazy, by the way. Behold my success.
Angel: I am not jealous.
Buffy: You're not jealous? What, vampires don't get jealous?
Angel: See? Whenever we fight you always bring up the vampire thing.
Buffy: Well, I didn’t come here to fight.
[Vampire surprises them both]
Buffy: Oh, right, I did.