Are you crazy? You can't let them ride down the stairs like that. They need helmets.

Zoey

Dre: Not only is it fair, it's by design. Your mother and I waited eight years after you were born before having more children so we could take advantage of moments like this.
Rainbow: That's what I call planned parenthood.

He said Jack was born to steal bases, not TVs

Dre

Yeah you really did, by trying to make Mom and Grandma equal, you created an emotional half-fro.

Zoey

Rainbow: Are you horse-whispering me?
Dre: Is it working?
Rainbow: I do feel less riled
Dre: Ok let's go back to the stables

Baby it's not what it looks like, I just ate too many biscuits. It was an over-the-cover biscuit nap!

Dre

Jack: Hey, how come she only visits when Grandpa Pops is in Bermuda?
Zoey: Oh, it's a special game that divorced people play called give me your Lincoln and get out.

Dre: Babe I'm just trying to give you a nudge, help you pave the road.
Zoey: Pave the road? you ran me over.

Dre I have worked too hard and I went to school for too long and I took way too much Affirmative Action money. I mean, I may have even taken a scholarship from a Pacific Islander. Okay I did, but I can easily pass for a Samoan.

Rainbow

No, it's like fresh baked bread on my butt.

Junior

Dre: I'm giving you the gift of hunger.
Junior: Does it come with a receipt? Because I'd like to return it.

Diane: Why is there a plastic roof all over the food?
Dre: Baby that's a sneeze guard, it's to protect the food.
Jack: From getting into our mouths?