Ray: You thought I was dead?
Archer: Well, yeah, I just assumed...
Ray: And you didn't even take a moment!?

Cyril: What was that?
Archer: Probably a jaguar, excited about being magnificent and crepuscular.

The only limit is your imagination! Pew-Pew!

Eat a dick, jungle.

Ray: How long will it take you, Archer, to admit that you dick around every time we're in danger, just to screw with everybody, because of your complete - no, your utter contempt for your own mortality?!
Archer: I mean, yeah. Duh.

Archer Season 5 Episode 8 Quotes

Cyril: Why are you so scared of crocodiles?
Archer: Gee, I don't know, Cyril. Maybe deep down I'm afraid of any apex predator that lived through the K-T extinction. Physically unchanged for a hundred million years, because it's the perfect killing machine. A half ton of cold-blooded fury, the bite force of 20,000 Newtons, and stomach acid so strong it can dissolve bones and hoofs.

Eat a dick, jungle.

Archer