Alan: Let me tell you something young man, chapter two of your father's story hasn't been written.
Jake: Is chapter one, "I crapped my pants?"


Rating: 5.0 / 5.0 (2 Votes)
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Characters:
Alan Harper, Jake Harper
Episode:
Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 21: "Gumby with a Pokey"
Show:
Two and a Half Men
Related Quotes:
Alan Harper Quotes, Jake Harper Quotes, Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 21 Quotes, Two and a Half Men Quotes
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Two and a Half Men Season 7 Episode 21 Quotes

Don't take this the wrong way, but I'd rather get a maple syrup enema and sit on an ant pile.

Charlie

Alan: You might want to eat something so when you throw up later, it won't just be alcohol and stomach juice.
Charlie: Way ahead of you. (holds up drink) I call it an Egg McBorboun.