Peter: I'm trying to make love to you and all you can think about is Chris.
Lois: What?
Peter: Thanks to you, our son has a huge wang!
Lois: What do you mean?
Peter: Well, he certainly didn't get it from me?
Lois: Peter, what are you talking about?
Peter: I'll show you.
[Peter and Lois go to Chris' room while he is sleeping and Peter pulls back the covers]
Lois: Wow. No wonder he's always slouching

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Peter Griffin, Lois Griffin
Family Guy Season 3 Episode 5: "And the Wiener is..."
Family Guy
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Family Guy Season 3 Episode 5 Quotes

Lois: I used to date the pyro guy from Whitesnake.
Meg: What's Whitesnake?
Lois: That's the music mommies and daddies listen to

Face it, Peter. Sooner or later your gonna have to pass the torch. I remember the first time Kevin beat me. I was so proud of him. I gave him a little congratulatory punch in the arm. And then another. And then everything got a little hazy. He had to live with a foster family for a while