Mondays 8:00 PM on CBS
How-i-met-your-mother

Still? Still with the Lebron jokes?

Oh Can-adorable, am I right?

Ted: Sorry dude, we gotta wait for the real thing, no matter how tough it gets.
Barney: It gets pretty tough.
Ted: I know it does buddy.

Kids I cannot stress this enough. Barney and I were going through a tough time.

Instead of throwing away your life marrying some girl, you just go splitsies on a kid with your best bro!

Barney: You know what would kick ass?
Ted: Being gay?
Barney: Being gay!

When it's just not there, you can't force it.

While this font is often mistaken for Helvetica, it's actually Helvetica Bold. I can actually hear the sound of her vagina being boarded up.

Barney: Studies show that 83% of all college students desperately need, Sex Lessons!
Ted: Barney these are eighteen year olds!
Barney: Ted, these are eighteen year olds!

Ted: Jeez Lily it's like you have a butt on your chest.
Barney: Whoop whoop whoop whoop!

Robin, get me my legal pad. It's Pros and Cons Time!

Lily: Wait a minute. You're going to date two girls at once? Don't you think you should just choose one before it gets serious?
Ted: Define serious.
Lily: Well that's complicated. I guess you have to weigh expectations, emotional investments...
Marshall: Third base, serious at third base.

Displaying quotes 73 - 84 of 477 in total

HIMYM Quotes

You are the love of my life. Everything I have and everything I am is yours. Forever.

Barney

Whatever you do in this life, it's not legendary, unless your friends are there to see it.

Barney
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