Will: Wait, wait, so you're not firing us?
Sue: Not if you win a national championship, I'm not. However, if you do fail to win at nationals, I will fire you and you'll be forced to build creepy relationships with teenagers on your own time.

America, your prayers have been answered. Sue Sylvester is back at McKinley.

Blaine: I'll admit. I rejoined the Cheerios with the sole plan of destroying you from the inside.
Sue: Admirable.

Dear journal, I speak to you now not as Sue Sylvester, world class coach and educatrix, but as Sue Sylvester, freelance champion.

At the risk of stepping out of character, I brought donuts to calm everyone's frayed nerves.

[to Blaine] Well, I hope you're ready for some form-fitting polyester, gay Clark Kent from season one of Smallville. Because it looks like you're going to be the bottom of my Cheerios pyramid after all.

It's time to perfect my Nicki Minaj where the hell did that come from cuckoo for cocoa puffs crazy pants threat.

Blaine: I'm not rejoining the Cheerios.
Sue: Oh you most certainly are. Or something unfortunate will most likely be happening to you extremely soon.

Today is the day we honor St. Valentine, a man publicly beheaded for defying his government, by exchanging candies and chocolates to nonsensically render the objects of our affection more fat and less attractive.

Emma: Um, Sue, I feel really scared. I feel really overwhelmed. I feel like I can't think straight. I'm just really, really worried that this isn't going to work.
Sue: Well, of course it isn't going to work. You're a weird bird lady with a hollow pelvis and OCD. And Will Schuester is a weepy man-child whose greatest joy in life is singing with children. And his best friend? 19.

Santana: Look, please don't tell my mom.
Sue: Oh, I can't. I don't speak Spanish.

[to Santana] What is with you glee club ex-pats? Don't you have jobs. You have to have some source of income so you can pay the staff of scientists who service your teleporters that you all clearly on since you're constantly showing up here.

Glee Quotes

You know, a great big fat person once stood on this stage and told a group of a dozen or so nerds in hideous disco outfits that glee, by its very definition, is about opening yourself up to joy. Now it's no secret that for a long time I thought that was a load of hooey. As far as I could see the glee club was nothing but a place where a bunch of cowardly losers go to sing their troubles away and delude themselves into thinking that they live in a world that cares one iota about their hopes and dreams, totally divorced from the harsh reality that in the real world there's not much more to hope for than disappointment, heartbreak, and failure. And you know what. I was exactly right. Thats exactly what glee club is. But I was wrong about the cowardly part. What I finally realized, now that I'm well into my late thirties, it takes a lot of bravery to look around you and see the world not as it is but as it should be. A world where the quarterback becomes best friends with the gay kid, and the girl with the big nose ends up on Broadway. Finding the courage to open up your heart and sing about it. That's what glee club is. And for the longest time I thought that was silly, and now I think it's just about the bravest thing that anyone could do.

Sue

[to Finn] You know, I don't really know what's going to happen between us, but I know that you used to be the guy that would make me feel like the most special girl in the whole world, and it doesn't feel that way anymore. Now it just feels sad and confusing. And the worst part is that it doesn't even feel that bad anymore.

Rachel