[to Becky] Oh, honey. All healthy relationships are built on lies! You know what? I'm pretty sure that's why I ended up divorcing myself.

Spencer: You want me to infiltrate the glee club and be terrible on purpose so everyone gets demoralized and quits?
Sue: Works every time.

[to Kurt and Rachel] You two have just entered Sue Sylvester's Thunderdome.

[to Rachel] You were the very best the arts had to offer. Which means the arts clearly don't have much to offer now, do they? There is no glee club at this school. There will never be a glee club at this school as long as I'm in charge. Now get the hell out of here before I sick a convicted felon on you.

Thanks for making me feel like a girl.

This is America, we speak English here.

I just can’t even...excuse me I need to go kill myself.

Adultery. That’s what this is called.

This place smells like barf!

You see, I’ve been taking my cue from cable news lately and just lying a lot.

I have before me a buttload of angry letters from members of the animal husbandry club, their parents, Dayton local politicians, the National Autism Association as well as One Million Moms. Although in actuality there aren’t a million of them. There’s really only 100,000 but each and every one of them is an uptight bitch.

The only thing I can see you giving birth to is a bushel of russet potatoes.

Glee Quotes

[to Finn] You know, I don't really know what's going to happen between us, but I know that you used to be the guy that would make me feel like the most special girl in the whole world, and it doesn't feel that way anymore. Now it just feels sad and confusing. And the worst part is that it doesn't even feel that bad anymore.

Rachel

I just want somebody to love me.

Quinn