Tuesdays 8:00 PM on FOX
Glee

I suggest you pre-actively check into rehab, as you are a future alcoholic.

If I hear one song from that classic rock outfit journey, I will start pulling catheters.

I hate hospitals, William. That's why I kept voting for those death panels.

Sue: Where's the hate?
Will: Not the point of glee club, Sue.

For a brief period, I was a tamborine player for Wilson Phillips.

I've gotta get that girl on the Cheerios.

Will, you have more grease in your hair than the guy behind Wikileaks?

Katie Couric: You beat out the following losers: the economy, Mel Gibson, Dina Lohan... and Sparky Lohan, who is Dina Lohan's dog and, apparently, also a loser. How do you deal with that?
Sue: I've been drinking a lot of bleach.

No time for a fourtime, ladies. The bus leaves in five.

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