This room feels weird. I can't shake the feeling that I'm inhaling a lot dead skin.

You're welcome to sing The Sound of Silence in your hotel room. Right now.

By the power invested in me by a website, I hereby pronounce you Sue and Sue. You may kiss yourself.

I can't suspend someone for shoving you into a locker. He'll just say he tripped and accidentally pushed you. I use that excuse all the time.

I will expel him faster than a Thai takeout place can read back a delivery order.

Kurt: When you call me "lady," that's bullying and it's really hurtful.
Sue: I'm sorry. I genuinely thought that was your name.

I just prefer to think of the homleess as outdoorsy. So shine on urban campers!

I suggest selling yourself on Craigslist under the heading of 'Men seeking Men with butt chins.'

You make the underflaps of my breasts burn, like when I used to rub them with poison sumac.

Rest assured that I, and my attorney Gloria Allred, will be pressing charges.

Why don't you go home, rest, die? It doesn't matter. Because as my first official act as principal, you are fired.

There's no reason for you to be here... really, there's no reason for you to be here.

Glee Quotes

[to Kurt] You know, these Mounds bars are delicious, but you have to eat them. If you just hold them in your hand hoping that you might get to eat them one day, they're going to melt and you'll look like somebody just pooped in your hand. Don't let waiting for things to maybe work out with Blaine turn you into the guy who looks like somebody just pooped in their hand.

Brittany

I just want somebody to love me.

Quinn