Give me a break, Forman. I don't have a mommy.

(on Hyde's history paper)
Laurie: Oh yeah, what'd you get? A D?
Hyde: No. A C minus. (Red and Kitty cheer)
Eric: I got a B.
Red: You couldn't get an A?

(Eric and Laurie are fighting at dinner)
Hyde: Could we please not fight?
Laurie (imitating Hyde): Could we please not fight?
Eric (to Hyde): Could you please not suck?

(Hyde throws his phone at the wall when he sees Eric)
Hyde: Hey Forman.
Eric: Hi.
Hyde: Come on in. make yourself at home. I'm out of beer, but if you want you could break something.
Eric: Actually, I had my eye on the phone, so...

Red: (bleep) Damn it! I am tired of being (bleep) Santa Claus! Steven, you get your (bleep) together and you get your ass in the (bleep) damn car! We're going! (bleep) Now (bleep) damn it! Move it!
Hyde: Okay.
Kitty: You are just the sweetest man alive.
Red: (bleep)!

Red, I'm sorry your mom died and I'm sorry Kelso's an idiot.

Chrissy: See the establishment doesn't want us having sex because they know it makes us feel good, right? So if we can feel good on our own, what do we need the establishment for? So every time we have sex, it's a huge protest.
Hyde: You know what? I think I feel a huge protest coming on.

Hyde: Okay. All right. Do you remember that time when I was climbing your fence, and I hit my forehead on that tree branch, and I fell into your yard, and your dog Yogi came out of the house and bit me twice on the ass?
Kelso (laughing): Yeah, you bled and you cried.
Hyde: I bled. I didn't cry.
Kelso: Yeah, you did. You bled and you cried.
Hyde: And you laughed, man. A lot. While I was bleeding... You see my point?
Kelso: Yeah, it's funny when friends get hurt.
Hyde: Close enough.

(after painting a pot leaf on the water tower)
Hyde: I don't know. It kinda looks like it's giving the finger.
Kelso: No way, man. That is definitely a pot leaf!
(Kelso falls off the water tower)
Hyde: Hey Kelso, what's it look like down there?
Kelso (in pain): It looks like it's giving me the finger!

(about David)
Eric: I don't know. If I hit this guy, Donna's just gonna be pissed.
Kelso: No, man. Chicks dig that stuff! I mean, Leia, right, she acted like she was mad at Han. But I could tell she liked him.
Hyde: Kelso, man, what are you, an idiot? Leia likes Luke, I mean she kissed him on that bridge!
Kelso: Uh! Just for luck!

Fez: I'm so excited about Star Whores.
Hyde: Fez man, it's Star Wars.
Fez: Screw that.
Hyde: Hey Forman, man, this thing better be good. If I don't see some space jugs, I'm going to be super pissed.
Eric: Oh, hey, guys, I heard it was okay.
Kelso: Well, there is no way it's better than the Planet of the Apes. I mean, those apes were really good actors.

Fez: Oh, I know who I can ask to the Prom!
Hyde: Oh boy! Who Fez?
Fez: The lucky lady is... my English teacher!
Kelso: Fez, you can't take a teacher to the Prom!
Fez: Why not? She's always writing sexy comments on my homework: Nice Job, Good Effort, See Me, I love you... Okay, I made the last one up, but the other ones were real.

That 70's Show Quotes

Eric: If my dad catches me copping beers he'll kill me.
Hyde: I'm willing to take that risk.

Kitty: Well, the kids are off. I wonder where they went.
Red: Out of town.
Kitty: How do you know?
Red: I told them not to.