Phil Dunphy Quotes
Claire: Oh, how cute. You tried to scare me for Halloween
Phil: How in the world did that not frighten you? Some of this is my actual blood! I knicked myself putting it on.
Claire: Sweetie, you don't know the first thing about scaring people. It's all about plausibility. And you were awfully casual for a guy that just got an ax in the chest. You know, if you really wanted to scare me, you should have waited until I opened the closet and found you hanging by a necktie.
Phil: Excuse me! I killed myself?!
Claire: Yeah, totally plausible. I mean, you've been so happy all these years, the other shoe is bound to drop, right?
Hey, I came to see a movie I'd already seen and know where all the jump scares are. Can you tell me where the big ones are in this one?
I love it that you're smart now.
Laura: Did you pre-heat my oven?
Jay: Not on purpose.
Maybe spend a little less time with your nose in that psych book and a little more time being sexy.
Phil: On the trip's final morning, Dede was found in her room. She had apparently passed peacefully in her sleep, as a smile graced her face and her hands clutched ten pages of suggestions for the hotel staff.
Claire: That is so mom.
I am totally confused about what we're supposed to do.
Ok, so what does real estate equal? Eighty percent contact.
Hey. You there? We're having some trouble getting these bad boys down.
I know you're scared, but you should feel proud. You took kind of a weird kid and turned him into somebody so comfortable with himself, he's willing to take on a pretty big adventure.Cam
Margaret is very vulnerable! I've had to rescue her a bunch of times from cults and an Amway pyramid.Jay
Hey, you're blocking the driveway. Hit the road already.Haley