Leonard: Why would you buy peppermint schnapps?
Penny: Because I like peppermint, and it's fun to say schnapps!
Penny: You know, I do understand what you're going through.
Sheldon: Really? Did you just have the Nobel Prize in Waitressing stolen from you?
Leonard [about snuggie gift]: what does this mean?
Penny: Wine, credit cards and late night television are a bad combination
Penny [to comic book store owner]: What would you recommend as a gift for a 13 year old boy?
Stuart: A thirteen year old girl
Penny [at comic book store]: Everyone's staring at me!
Leonard: Don't worry, they're more scared of you than you are of them
Wolowitz: According to Alicia's Facebook page, she's hooking up with one of the producers on CSI.
Penny: Dead whore on TV, live one in real life.
Penny: It looks like the MySpace page of a 13 year old girl
Leonard: No it doesn't
Wolowitz: Oh please, Dateline could use it to attract predators
Sheldon: You'll effectively be paying yor self 5.19 per day
Penny: A day??
Sheldon: There are children in sneaker factories in Indonesia that outearn you
Sheldon: I'm a physicist. I have a working knowledge of the entire universe and everything it contains
Penny: Who's Radiohead?
Sheldon [after twitching for a minute]: I have a working knowledge of the important things
Wolowitz [about his phone call]: Looks like I'm going to have sex tonight
Penny: His right hand is calling him?
I'm from Nebraska. When we shoot things, it's because we want to eat em' or make them leave our boyfriends alone
Penny: What are we gonna do?
Leonard: We? No, no, no. You had your chance to be "we" for like a year and a half now. Right now, you are you and you are screwed.