Michael: Holly Flax...marrying me will you be?
Holly: Your wife becoming me will I.

This is where I fell in love with you, and this is where I ask you to marry me.

Ryan: Will you marry me, Holly?
Holly: No.
Michael: Only one that I was kinda worried about.

Angela: Will you marry me?
Holly: No.
Michael: That would be hot. I would pay to see that.

Gabe: Will you marry me?
Holly: No.
Michael: Easy no.

Oscar: Will you marry me?
Holly: No.
Michael: That marriage would be a sham.

I am not going to be proposed to in the break room. That is not going to be our story. I shoulda burned this place down when I had a chance.

Michael: I want this to be an event that everyone talks about always and forever.
Jim: Totally reasonable.

How bout this, I throw a corpse dressed like me off of the roof...

I am calling because I'm going to have to fire your daughter Holly because she's such a terrible employee. I'm just kidding.

Old Lady: How much for the Slip 'n Slide?
Michael: Get lost.

Packer is going to be here til the day he dies, just like the rest of us.

The Office Quotes

Dwight: What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No, I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris, by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years; she's never taken another lover. I don't care, I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.

Guess what, I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don't know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me... No, don't sue me. That is the opposite of the point that I'm trying to make.

Michael