Michael: Ryan, how are you today?
Ryan: Why don't you ask my therapist? My mom certainly pays her enough.

Anything can happen at the Dundies. They're like the Golden Globes only less mean.

When Larry King died, they didn't just cancel his show.

Hey Toby! You suck!

Erin: Michael can you stop talking now, I have to do your lips.
Michael: Don't shave my lips.

Dwight: Thanks for meeting me.
Michael: Are you kidding? I'd come anywhere to see a turtle.

This is Jim and Pam, aka Jap.

As you know, one of my favorite things is fan fare for its own sake.

Michael: Do not tell my fiance I'm drinking on a Wednesday.
Deangelo: Haha. I won't...I don't know her.

Deangelo: To beginnings and endings.
Michael: And to middles, the unsung heroes.

Holly has to go back to Colorado. I'm going with her. I'm leaving.

Michael: We're moving to Colorado.
Kevin: All of us?

The Office Quotes

A little cover up on your adam's apple will make it appear smaller, which will make you look less like a transvestite.

Michael (to Gabe)

Would I rather be feared or loved? Umm...easy, both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.

Michael