Shauna: OK, well, since we're, you know romantically involved, I won't print any of it
Anne: That's great, thank you so much
Mark: Well, you know I wouldn't say romantically involved... going forward
Anne: (rolling her eyes) Oh my god!

Recently I have been thinking about maybe leaving this job, but I felt like I needed a sign. And then Ann broke up with me the week I was going to propose, the government got shut down and yesterday one of those pigeons took an [expletive] on me. And I was indoors, so...

Mark: You know, not everyone has your enthusiasm for this work.
Leslie: You know, I guess I've been mispronouncing your name all these years, Mark Brendana-quits.

Man, I should have yelled at you way more.

You ever seen this man sleep? It's like underwater ballet.

Leslie: Can you get five eagles? No, get 10 eagles!
Mark: Leslie-
Leslie: No, you're right. It's your life. Give her as many eagles as you want.

Mark: Leslie, can I run something by you really quick?
Leslie: Sure, I love having things run by me.
Mark: I feel like you're being sarcastic right now.
Leslie: No, no. I'm not. I genuinely love it. Run it by me. Go ahead. Go, go, go.

Andy: Ron, do you think maybe I should put Mark in a headlock? That way I can show everyone how to escape a pervert.
Mark: In the scenario you just laid out, you're the pervert. You understand that right?
Andy: You wish.

Ron: No, I'm bringing my workshop up to the Swanson code. And if the Swanson code happens to overlap with the city government code...
Mark: Shut up!

Ron: I understand that city codes exist. And I know why they exist. And I understand that you enforce them.
Mark: OK.
Ron: OK, good talk. Can you sign off on my plans now?

Mark: You've got hazardous chemicals over here.
Ron: Yeah, which only I am breathing. It's the same liberty that gives me the right to fart in my own car. Are you going to tell a man that he can't fart in his own car?

Mark: Ron, none of this is up to code.
Ron: Sure it is. It's up to the Swanson code.

Parks & Rec Quotes

"I guess I kind of hate most things. But I never really seem to hate you. So I want to spend the rest of my life with you, is that cool?"

April

Just remember every time you look up at the moon, I too will be looking at a moon. Not the same moon, obviously, that’s impossible.

Andy