Marge: Homer, that's too much sugar.
Homer: It's not sugar, it's carmel!

Marge: Oh God! Someone carved swastikas on your eyes.
Homer: Oh Marge, I'm sure it was just some guy filled with hate.

Marge: This is so exciting! Watching a movie outside with the whole town.
Comic Book Guy: Yes, thank you for talking to one of us like we just tuned in! (his lawn chair collapses) Ooh, a fat man falls! Real original!

Marge: (About the Merry Go Round) Can I go again?
Homer: All night, baby.
(Bart and Lisa groan.)

Marge: Homer!
Lisa: Bart!
INS Man: Portuguese Fausto!
Fausto: Ay! Yi! Yi!

Homer: Why did you let that loser into our home?
Marge: I'll tell you why--Christian charity.
Homer: Christian Charity? What does a porn star have to do with this?

I'm so sick of Gil, he ruins my Thanksgiving, uses my leg razor to peel his carrots

Gil: Aw, come on, you can't say no to Gil.
Marge: (Loudly) NO!!!!

Marge: Bartholomew J. Simpson! How can you be so mean?
Bart: What can you do about it?
(She whacks him on the head with a spoon.)
Bart: Hey!
Marge: I'll whack you with the whole salad set if you don't start thinking about others!

Homie, this sculpting has made me feel so fulfilled! I'm as hopeful and full of life as I was in the years before I met you!

Marge: Homer, don't drink and drive!
Homer: Fine, I'll drive between sips.

Marge: Don't worry. I have a secret weapon. One more deadly then any gun.
Bart: Lisa's face?
Marge: A phone tree.

The Simpsons Quotes

(The family watches Homer's launch on TV.)
Bart: Go, Dad, go!
Lisa: How doth the hero, strong and brave, a celestial path to the heavens paved!
(The family stares at her.)
Lisa: Go, Dad, go.

Mr. Burns: I specifically said, no geeks!
Milhouse: But my mom says I'm cool...