Lois [as Stewie aims a blaster at her]: Well, let me just say, it's
nice to be standing here with no one trying to murder me.
Stewie: Yea, no you're fine...

Brian: Oh, my God. Fred Savage is the greatest actor in the world!
Savage: That's all I ever wanted to be known for.
Lois: Is it okay if we run this story instead?
Savage: Sure thing!
Daniel Stern: [as the voice-over from "The Wonder Years"] It was just then that I knew that things were finally going my...
Savage: [angrily] I DON'T NEED YOU ANYMORE!!!

Lois: Peter, where have you been? You left for the market six hours ago! Did you get the beans?
Peter: Lois, I've got something better! You know how you've always wanted a real diamond engagement ring?
Lois: [gasps, touched] Oh my God!
Peter: That's right, I've bought a horse!

Lois: Here's a little tip: If your instinct tells ya to do somethin', don't do it. If your instinct tells ya not to do somethin', IT'S PROBABLY THE RIGHT THING TO DO!!

No matter what you do the rest of your life, you'll always be garbage.

Where you off to sweetie? You gonna go see three movies in a row so it seems like you're off doing something?

You can't just around in black face. It's racist. Now go upstairs and put on that Indian chief costume I bought you.

Oh my God. You're 40!?

Princess Leia/Lois: There's something out there!
Han Solo/Peter: Where?
Princess Leia/Lois: Out there in the cave!
Han Solo/Peter: Ha! Crazy women always hearing thngs.
Chewbacca/Brian: There's something out there!
Han Solo/Peter: Let's go check it out.

Han/Peter: Hey guys.
Leia/Lois: Han! What are you still doing here?
Han/Peter: Well I just realized my spaceship works better when I HAVE THE KEYS! Duh!

Leia/Lois: We're gonna be pulverized!
Han/Peter: Look, we got four or five of the main characters on board this ship, so I think we're okay.

Leia/Lois: May I have everyone's attention please? We're evacuating into outer space with literally infinite directions in which to flee. However, we have decided that our transports will travel directly towards the fleet of stormtroopers. Any questions?
Rebel: Yeah, um, is there someone from the military we can talk to, a man perhaps?

Family Guy Quotes

Stewie: (Comes into the bedroom) Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mama! Mama! Mama! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mummy! Mummy! Mumma! Mumma! Mumma!
Lois: What!?
Stewie: Hi! (Giggling and running out of the room)

I forgot Yelp was a weapon for dumb people, you taught me something today Brian.

Stewie