The more you know, the less you understand.

Gibbs [on being told about memes]

Sloane: You’re gonna leave a complete stranger alone in your house.
Gibbs: Yes.
Sloane: I could rob you blind.
Gibbs: Lock up when you’re done.

Sloane: Ah, I can see you’re a glass half full kind of guy!
Gibbs: Depends. What’s in the glass?

Jimmy: Oh! Am I interrupting?
Gibbs: Nope. You’re right on time.
Jimmy: That’s unusual.

Sportelli: Ever wish you weren’t the boss, Gibbs? I thought I was getting a promotion. Instead I got everyone else’s problems.
Gibbs: Our job’s to fix ‘em.
Sportelli: Exactly. But what if we can’t?

Yeah, look, I’ve survived worse, I’ve cheated death a bunch, but… this is different. I thought it was over.

You’ve just said more to me about how you feel in the last two minutes than in all the time that I’ve known you. If that’s not a new you, I don’t know what is.

Grace Confalone [to Gibbs]

Bishop [about Ducky and Jimmy]: To think they actually enjoy this!
Gibbs: Ha! Face it -- we *all* enjoy this.

McGee: Why’d you have to swing so hard?
Gibbs: Why’d you have to have to break my wood carving?

McGee: Well, we went from a snowball’s chance in hell of getting out of here to a--
Gibbs: --snowball’s chance in Arizona.

Gibbs: It’s strictly voluntary.
McGee: I’m good.
Gibbs: Well, you got new responsibilities.
McGee: Boss, I appreciate that, but… don’t forget, I’m an NCIS Special Agent.

McGee: What did Bishop say?
Gibbs: We should go to church.
Torres: Oh, my mom would be so happy right now…

NCIS Quotes

I'm more of a Super-Mario guy, myself.

Captain Wescott

[voiceover] Anyone can achieve their fullest potential, who we are might be predetermined, but the path we follow is always of our own choosing. We should never allow our fears or the expectations of others to set the frontiers of our destiny. Your destiny can't be changed but, it can be challenged. Every man is born as many men and dies as a single one.

McGee