Jake: The only thing I haven't been letting you do, Gibbs, is over-riding NSA jurisdiction. And we're under no legal obligation to explain why.
Gibbs: Do you want my opinion? Your job sucks.
Vance: Gibbs....
Gibbs: The longer we go before checking Korkmaz's computer, the better chance we have the killer gets away.
Jake: Okay then. Go ahead. NSA surrenders access.
Vance: Excuse me, did you just say.....
Jake: I'll clear it upstairs. Any repercussions....I'll take the hit.

Gibbs: Drop the bag. Just put it down. Put it down. That's it. Brad, look at me. You're a good kid.
Brad: No I'm not. [He detonates the bomb]

Vance: We need to coordinate transport for Qasim.
Gibbs: Excuse me?
Vance: These are orders from the State Department. Gibbs it's out of my hands.
Gibbs: What - the United States now cowers to terrorist demands?
Vance: I don't like it any more than you do, but a Marine's life is on the line.
Gibbs: So is Qasim's.

Bishop: What is it you expect me to do? Take down a whole village of insurgents on my own? That's not me. I'm an analyst.
Gibbs: I thought you were a field agent.
Bishop: Gibbs, whatever lesson you're trying to teach me is going to get Qasim and Corporal Collins killed. My job is in there, not out there.
Gibbs: Your job, Bishop, is to do what I tell you to do. You can do this.
Bishop: Don't put me in a position I'm not trained for.
Gibbs: Training's not the problem - you are. I told you, I got your back. Stop hiding behind things that are familiar, Bishop. You're better than that. The answers you want, Bishop - they're out there.

Qasim: Agent Gibbs, please pass along my gratitude to the other agents for capturing Landis' killer.
Gibbs: I'm not your messenger. Do it yourself. Come on - chop chop. Let's go. Hustle up.
Qasim: I don't understand.
Bishop: We put a call into the Secretary of the Navy. It took some convincing but after reading over fifty U.S. Marine statements on your behalf, she endorsed your special immigrant visa application. You're coming with us.
Qasim: To the United States to live?
Gibbs: Don't go getting all excited just yet.
Bishop: You'll be required to work at a translation post in D.C. while your visa's being processed. It's not negotiable.
Qasim: Where will I be found?
Gibbs: NCIS
Qasim: I believe I can manage that.

Zoe: Should I go home, change first?
Tony: I see no reason to do that. I think you look exquisite.
Zoe: Thank you. I just want everything to go perfectly. To tell you the truth I'm a nervous wreck. I think I've seen Meet the Parents way too many times.
Tony: Well I can assure you my father is nothing like Robert DeNiro.
Gibbs: Come on, come on. Get to work.
Tony: Gibbs on the other hand...

McGee: Okay you're telling me that Ziva knew too?
Vance: Agent McGee, your ego is not the subject of this briefing.

Palmer: I told Tony that you wanted to speak to Agent Gibbs, not that Gibbs ever actually speaks. After "what do you got, doc?" all I get is angry glare.
Tony: Hey Palmer.
Gibbs: Angry glare.

Hankos: Do you think he's working with Orlando?
Gibbs: We're going to find out.
Hankos: If he is, no deals, no plea bargain. You make him pay. People may have forgotten the Metropolitan attack. I haven't.

Edmunds: In the meantime, what do I tell the Colombian ambassador?
Gibbs: You're a diplomat....
Vance: ....say something diplomatic.

Orlando: I came here because I have a family. I know how you cowboys work. Shoot first, ask questions later. My children are more important to me than my entire empire. I'm not willing to risk them getting cruise missle'd coming home from school one day. I want them to learn how to read, not how to scan the skies looking for drones. So, you win.
Gibbs: Just like that.
Orlando: I was retiring anyway. I was announcing it at that meeting you tried to crash.

Bishop: By all means, stretch your legs, Tim. Keep the monotony out of monogamy.
Tony: By cheating?
Bishop: No. Just words.
McGee: Elaborate.
Bishop: Harmless practice for later use on your actual flirt. Practice makes perfect. Look, what I'm saying is....
Gibbs: Keep the tool sharp.
Bishop: See, Gibbs knows what I'm talking about.
Gibbs: Ah, I got no idea.

NCIS Quotes

McGee: All right. Well you should probably know that Abby and I used to date?
Bishop: Ew. Like, each other?
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: Wait - isn't that a violation of rule 12, never date a....
McGee: It was a long time ago. After we'd broken up, one night I went to her lab. Found a scribbled piece paper; a list. Potential boyfriends had to fulfill certain conditions by a pre-arranged date or else, goodbye.
Bishop: Such as.
McGee: Things started off relatively normal: opening the door for her, flowers, putting the seat down. Then around number 8, it gets uh...
Bishop: What?
McGee: Does she know you have these?
Bishop: Does she know you have these?
McGee: Yeah she wasn't happy when she found out.
Bishop: These are all very specific.
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: These ideas apply to you?
McGee: No those rules weren't in place when we were together. At least I don't think so.
Bishop: What's with the two month cutoff? Abby's sabotaging herself. I've seen stuff like this before. We have to talk to her.

McGee: Rule number 70 - keep digging till you hit bottom.
Abby: McGee! There is no rule 70.
McGee: Well, I--
Abby: You just made up a rule. This McGibbs thing has really gone to your head. I don't even recognize you right now.