Bishop, I’ve been listening to you for the last ten minutes, and I *still* don’t know what you’re saying.

‘You think you’re alone in the dark. Close your eyes. Remember everything good.’ My mom said that to me just before she died. Smart lady.

Fornell: Hey, Gibbs! You gotta come over here and push down on my pelvis!
Gibbs: I'm gonna pass on that.

Fornell: What on earth are you doing?!
Emily: Me? What are *you* doing, Dad?
Fornell: I *was* sleeping!
Emily: I noticed. Still on Uncle Gibbs's couch for some reason.
Fornell: You nearly scared me to death. And "Uncle Gibbs" is probably upstairs loading his bazooka as we speak!
Gibbs [calmly eating cereal]: Nope. I'm good.

Next time you leave the country on assignment, Bishop? Tell your brothers!

Anthony DiNozzo Senior: I was hoping you would have some words of wisdom?
Gibbs: ...Nope!

Abby: Gibbs, I can't have a conversation by myself!
Gibbs: It's never stopped you before.

Detective Campbell: I invited NCIS here as a courtesy.
Gibbs: How about as a courtesy, I don't kick your ass!

You're why others are alive. No phone call killed your friend.

Gibbs: That's a long swim for an innocent man!
Wayne: I'm not innocent! ...of the imposter stuff...

Gibbs: It's a classified government file!
Fornell: I'm a classified government guy!

Fornell: Get your hands off that light switch! You'll ruin the mood.
Gibbs: "The mood"? We gonna make out? What?
Fornell: I'm just trying to express my appreciation for your hospitality and friendship.
Gibbs: You wanna show your appreciation? Stop wearing my clothes!

NCIS Quotes

‘You think you’re alone in the dark. Close your eyes. Remember everything good.’ My mom said that to me just before she died. Smart lady.

Gibbs

McGee: All right. Well you should probably know that Abby and I used to date?
Bishop: Ew. Like, each other?
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: Wait - isn't that a violation of rule 12, never date a....
McGee: It was a long time ago. After we'd broken up, one night I went to her lab. Found a scribbled piece paper; a list. Potential boyfriends had to fulfill certain conditions by a pre-arranged date or else, goodbye.
Bishop: Such as.
McGee: Things started off relatively normal: opening the door for her, flowers, putting the seat down. Then around number 8, it gets uh...
Bishop: What?
McGee: Does she know you have these?
Bishop: Does she know you have these?
McGee: Yeah she wasn't happy when she found out.
Bishop: These are all very specific.
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: These ideas apply to you?
McGee: No those rules weren't in place when we were together. At least I don't think so.
Bishop: What's with the two month cutoff? Abby's sabotaging herself. I've seen stuff like this before. We have to talk to her.