Bobby: Steak and champagne.
Laurie: I love me some beef and bubbles. Oh! That should be our secret detective names.

You broke Bobby, you fix him. And I'm borrowing this. It's cute.

Ellie: Really Bug Hookers?
Laurie: That's the title!

Do you know who else mates for life? Termites.

Could you imagine if we ever dated. It would be like dropping a bomb on a forest fire.

(to Ellie about Andy) I'm going to beat the optimism out of that man.

Jules: What did he just say?
Laurie: Got me!
Ellie: Razzle dazzle.

You said you'd be mean, but that cut like a knife.

(pretending to be Ellie) Jules, I can say you look beautiful, because you're the only one I'm nice to.

Chick: Ding a ling a ling...
Jules: That's my cue since I was four. I had to use both my hands.
Laurie: Awe how cute.

Why? Why won't he love me.

Smith: Wow! That was like writing a mechanic bull.
Laurie: We should break up more often.

Cougar Town Quotes

Laurie: Jules told me never to ask, but why do you call me Jellybean?
Ellie: Well JB, when Jules first hired you I thought you were so simple minded she could convince you that Jellybeans were more valuable than gold and subsequently pay you in Jellybeans. This concept was eventually shorted into your nickname, Jellybean.

Grayson: Shall we?
Jules: Indeed!