Laurie Keller Quotes
Ellie: Stan is a major handful.
Laurie: Bitch please, one of my brother's thought he was a pitbull.
- Permalink: Bitch please, one of my brother's thought he was a pitbull.
Laurie: Highway to the lady zone, what what.
Ellie: Highway indeed.
- Permalink: Highway indeed.
Ellie: We're at a public event this is not the place for ear sex and a full body rub down.
Laurie: All you do is take me granted.
- Permalink: All you do is take me granted.
Letting you put this green screen in my apartment was one the worst mistakes of my life, and I've went out with Dennis Rodman y’all.
I haven’t hurt this bad since I had to push my childhood home to a gas station. I would give anything to stop.
That’s the first time I've been called a slut in a bad way.
- Permalink: The beautiful bitch is back.
Jules: Hey, does it make me gay if I eat this?
Ellie: I think it does.
Jules: Well I’m doing it anyway.
Laurie: Do you want a fork?
- Permalink: Do you want a fork?
Even I’m uncomfortable, and I once had sex in a cemetery. I had "Rita Rogers Loving Wife and Mother" printed on my back for two weeks.
Laurie: Hey, for the record I wore underwear tonight so you'd think I was classy.
Travis: No you didn't.
Laurie: I didn't. Turns out I don't actually own any.
- Permalink: Hey, for the record I wore underwear tonight so you'd think I wa...
No one's ever made me a stalker video that I didn't have to see in a courtroom first. I love it.
- Permalink: No one's ever made me a stalker video that I didn't have to see ...
Laurie: Burn in hell you sad, desperate skank.
Grayson: Texting your mom?
- Permalink: Burn in hell you sad, desperate skank. Texting your mom? Yea...
Don't bum out Jules, not everyone is blessed with our God given lack of judgment.
- Permalink: Don't bum out Jules, not everyone is blessed with our God given ...