You have a lost and found Bang Box? Disgusting.

Jules: When I rank all the things that make me want to die it goes: books, snakes, PBS, acapella.

He's a group exploder. It's a gift.

You're the kiss master.

Jules: Roleplayahs!
Grayson: You have the right to remain naked!

Tom: They made my garden gnomes gay.
Jules: Actually, that was me Tom.

Tom: The Bicycle Boys stole my fountain.
Jules: [Gasp]
Grayson: No!
Andy: Come on!
Ellie: Damn them!

Did you turn Officer Pumpkin Head around and blow his cover?

Travis: We should just eat cave man style. No dishes to clean that way.
Jules: Get the shades.

Jules: Oh Trav, honey, you look so tired. If you're gonna drive back to school tonight, you're gonna have to drink a lot of caffeine. I'll give you some sleeping pills to bring you down.
Travis: As much as I appreciate the completely unhealthy advice I'm almost 20, no need to worry about me.
Jules: Okay, I'll stop.

Jules: Did you really just hiss?
Ellie: I'm trying it out.

Jules: Ellie, I love you so much. I want to ask you something.
Ellie: Are we finally running away together? Because I keep a bag in my truck!
Jules: Me too.
Ellie: Awesome.

Cougar Town Quotes

Laurie: Jules told me never to ask, but why do you call me Jellybean?
Ellie: Well JB, when Jules first hired you I thought you were so simple minded she could convince you that Jellybeans were more valuable than gold and subsequently pay you in Jellybeans. This concept was eventually shorted into your nickname, Jellybean.

Jules: You smell nice.
Dr. Evans: That's the smell of confidence.