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Cougar-town

Jules: Do her nipples look like mine?
Grayson: No.
Bobby: Yeah.
Bobby: Well, I got a hold of them before Trav did.

Travis: Admittedly, Game of Thrones gives me a giant nerdgasm, but I gotta warn you guys it's a little racy.
Jules: Oh Trav, we're adults, we can handle it - oh, wow, boobs already!

Grayson: Hey, where'd you go just now?
Jules: I was lying on the floor of the tub sobbing. You don't pee in that, right?

I can't believe we're in Napa. I think we're meeting God.

Grayson: There is no such thing as a happy stroke.
Jules: Then what did Kurt Douglas have?
Grayson: A stroke.

Jules: Taters are for laters.
Travis: She actually did say that.

Jules: I'm sorry we can't hang tonight because we all have a very big important thing we have to go to.
Ellie: That thing got cancelled. I do have a different thing that only I have to go to.

Ellie: I can't be married to someone in public office. Jules, I have to interact with people. You know I hate the people.
Jules: That's what you get for telling Holly our thing was cancelled.
Ellie: You know what I hope? The Karma Gods get you.

Jules: You know what I learned from my friendship with Ellie?
Grayson: There's no such thing as too mean?
Travis: Never let your friends know for sure if you like them?
Jules: Always hold a grudge?

So you think Bobby and I could produce a doctor? [Jules and Grayson both laugh]

When you get up from that ottoman I'd go get a pregnancy test.

Jules: Way to go new guy.
Grayson: New guy? I am a key member of this group. I provide the sizzle.

Displaying quotes 37 - 48 of 300 in total

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Cougar Town Quotes

Wooo! How can I do woo wrong?

Jules

Laurie [to Jules for picture]: Arch your back and stick out your chest
Ellie: And say classy!

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