Ellie: We've been robbed!
Jules: Dun dun dun... I don't know why I did that.

Jules: You know, I was trying to find the perfect setting and now I just don't know what to do. I know I have to tell them, or, a different approach, we hop in a car, drive west, and never look back.
Ellie: Don't joke! I packed my Thelma and Louise bag six years ago, so say the word I'll go grab it.

I have two hours to get healthy. It's like cramming for a test.

The only thing I've ever made from scratch is Travis.

Yep, we raised a deadbeat.

If I’m running, you’re running. Are you new to this group?

Jules: The mayor’s wife can take a bottle of wine?
Ellie: Uh, no that’s more of an Ellie thing. We should walk faster.

Jules: Hey, does it make me gay if I eat this?
Ellie: I think it does.
Jules: Well I’m doing it anyway.
Laurie: Do you want a fork?

Duh, no paper bills less tree murder.

Jules: Ever since I got back from Hollywood I've turned into a real movie slut.
Andy: I think you mean movie buff.
Ellie: No, no she's right, the expression is movie slut - change approved.

Pale and tan swirl.

Why do these stars have names on them?

Cougar Town Quotes

Laurie: Jules told me never to ask, but why do you call me Jellybean?
Ellie: Well JB, when Jules first hired you I thought you were so simple minded she could convince you that Jellybeans were more valuable than gold and subsequently pay you in Jellybeans. This concept was eventually shorted into your nickname, Jellybean.

Grayson: Shall we?
Jules: Indeed!