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Royal-pains

Evan: I think I just got my first issue.
Hank: I think you just got your first bribe.

Hank: If you can't join them, crush them?
Shelby: I am sure it will be a while before I can crush you.

I am just not ready to have a baby.

Maybe the next time you can pull over my brother for tweeting while driving and lock him up for a couple days.

I am better at starting relationships than deepening them.

Jill: So what was it like to watch your little brother get married?
Hank: It was weird. To me he's still the kid who ate $.85 in nickels on a dare.

Eddie R. [about Hank's cell phone]: Really, Hank, On Hannukah?
Hank: I am so sorry, Rabbi Lawson!

Owen: I know you're thinking that Owen has gained a few pounds since the last time you saw him. But I want you to know, I am on The Lipitor.
Hank: Do you know that The Lipitor is not the substitute for the good eating habits?

That's not appropriate Ken, that's not appropriate.......

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