Evan: So we agree to disagree?
Hank: Like we always do.

Hank: What's with the Johnny Cash fashion tribute?
Evan: I'm in mourning.

Trying to get rid of this room seems way the hell more crazy than just trying to stay away from it.

Quid pro quo you deserve better from me.

(about Evan) There's no stopping him when he's like this. The bylaws for our treehouse were 8 pages long...and it was an imaginary treehouse.

You're seduced by anyone with an entourage.

Evan: I love ya.
Hank: Like you.

Boris: Life isn't always simple.
Hank: But death is.

Hank: I need a bottle of vodka, a very sharp, pointed knife, uh, a Bic pen, a sandwich baggie and some duct tape.
Libby: Sandwich baggie, duct tape. Who are you? MacGyver?

Royal Pains Quotes

Wow, you really are harbor-festive.

Hank [to Divya]

I was going to pick up Indian food, but I thought it might be offensive.

Jeremiah