Oh my God he's on a horse.

Laurie: Ellie, I saw Andy's feet...I'm so sorry.
Ellie: No one understands.

Andy: There's my girl I need a kiss.
Ellie: You'll live.

Ellie: I miss being a ho.
Laurie: You want back in? Because we'll take you back.

It wouldn't have been a thong on a six-year old!

Jules: Did you really just hiss?
Ellie: I'm trying it out.

Jules: Ellie, I love you so much. I want to ask you something.
Ellie: Are we finally running away together? Because I keep a bag in my truck!
Jules: Me too.
Ellie: Awesome.

Jules: Andy let the ice cream melt so he had to die.
Ellie: It's only pretend murder. We used to fight so much about the little things, now, whenever I get so mad that when I want to kill him I just do it.
Andy: It's been a great tool in our marriage

Jules: Sweetie, this should be the gang.
Ellie: It totally should.

Old Ferrett eyes is like four centimeters dilated right now.

Jules: This is the first time on this trip it's been just the ladies.
Ellie: It's an embarrassment of bitches.

Ellie: It's for the lady who likes to lounge by the pool, but also get paid for sex.
Laurie: You can do that? Is that a job?

Cougar Town Quotes

Laurie: Jules told me never to ask, but why do you call me Jellybean?
Ellie: Well JB, when Jules first hired you I thought you were so simple minded she could convince you that Jellybeans were more valuable than gold and subsequently pay you in Jellybeans. This concept was eventually shorted into your nickname, Jellybean.

Jules: You smell nice.
Dr. Evans: That's the smell of confidence.