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Cougar-town

Mopey leads right to gropey, fix it or bleed.

Hey Dime Eyes, thanks for letting us elope with you.

Grayson: It's actually illegal for me to sell after I close.
Ellie: That's why I'm not paying for it.

I'm only an okay storm; I'm not a perfect storm.

Jules: I'm sorry we can't hang tonight because we all have a very big important thing we have to go to.
Ellie: That thing got cancelled. I do have a different thing that only I have to go to.

Ellie: I can't be married to someone in public office. Jules, I have to interact with people. You know I hate the people.
Jules: That's what you get for telling Holly our thing was cancelled.
Ellie: You know what I hope? The Karma Gods get you.

Andy: He's your son.
Ellie: He needs to learn.

Park Ranger: You married to one of those guys?
Ellie: No, they're lovers.

How could you not believe me about my mom? You're my best friend, all I ask is that you have blind faith in me, and that you hit me with a shovel if I ever got a toe ring.

I get Big Carl? What's going on? Are you dying?

No wine for you!

Ellie: You're not crazy about the ditzy, trashy, fake blonde, fake tan, fake boobs, club skank you one-night standed to make that baby.
Jules: She says it better.

Displaying quotes 49 - 60 of 207 in total
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