Cougar Town

Ellie Torres Quotes (Page 18)

Ellie: Do you remember that great Thanksgiving blowup where your uncle mike got drunk and told your cousin she was invited.
Jules: She was fourteen and Korean, on some level she knew.
 • Rating: Unrated

Grayson: So you're having the whole gang over turkey day, huh?
Jules: Well
Grayson: I don't really have any plans since my wife left and all our friends were pretty much her friends. And both my parents are dead....
Ellie: Did they die in the last six months?
Jules: No.
Ellie: Then who cares? Hand me my drink.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ellie: That's the reason I got a Cabana! To avoid guys with barb wired tattoos.
 • Rating: Unrated

Laurie [to Jules for picture]: Arch your back and stick out your chest
Ellie: And say classy!
 • Rating: Unrated

Ellie [to Bobby]: You need to warn me when you're going to give me life advice so I can get out my notebook
 • Rating: Unrated

Ellie [to Andy]: Listen half pint, I'm not gonna thank you for things you're supposed to do. If I did I'd have to start thanking you for killing bugs and supporting me
 • Rating: Unrated

Ellie: You totally had sex last night
Jules: How'd you know
Ellie: I'm your best friend, I know these things, plus there's a condom wrapper on your back
Jules: Oh, is it just the one?
Ellie: Good god, Jules

 • Rating: Unrated

Ellie [about Josh]: He kisses with a perfect seal around you mouth like he's trying to suck your brains out
Jules: I know, but he's gotten so much better
Ellie: That's better?
Josh: I'm gonna get us some more drinks
 • Rating: Unrated

Ellie: If you don't stop with the hazelnut, I'm gonna make my own coffee
Jules: No you won't
Elie: You're right, even saying it was too much work
 • Rating: Unrated

[Andy and Ellie watching their sex tape]
Andy: Is my back really that hairy?
Ellie: Yes
Andy: Is this in slow motion?
Ellie: No
Andy: Can we just erase this?
Ellie: Yes
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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