Andy: Why did we pretend like we worked here?
Dwight: Is that what we were doing?

Dwight: My resolution is: meet a loose woman

Wow, did your baby draw that?

What are you gonna do now? You gonna make fun of our leader's weird voice? [mumbles] Over the line, Jim.

In the end, the greatest snowball isn't a snowball at all...it's fear. Merry Christmas.

Didn't think your affectionate nicknames would be your undoing, did you Jim?

I have no feeling in my fingers or penis, but I think it was worth it.

Oh my God, it's the first snowfall of Christmas. Is that just so magical for you, little girl? Can you not wait to have a hot chocolate and cuddle up with Poppa and tell him about all your Christmas dreams? Hmmm? It's not even real snow. Look it's dusting. Pitiful.

Dwight: We have a colleague with the same name. You're not a liar too are you.
Other Pam: I've been known to bend the truth.
Dwight: Damn it Pam! Get out!

Pam: You've been watering down the soap?
Dwight: Why do you even need soap? Are you that bad at going to the bathroom?

Dwight: As a fellow Dunder Mifflin employee, I feel for you, but like you, I am completely powerless to the whims of the new building owner.
Jim: Which is you.

Owning a building is a war between the landlord and the tenant. Not a literal war, unfortunately, but I am using the same tactics.

Displaying quotes 133 - 144 of 634 in total

The Office Quotes

I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days before you've actually left them.

Andy

If onlys and justs were candies and nuts, then everyday would be un de donkfest!

Dwight
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