Dwight: You got this Kosher certified?
Ryan: No I meant it like, it's cool, it's Kosher, it's all good.

Schrutes are farmers by hobby and traders by trade.

Dwight: Who's dirt box is this?
Holly: That's our zen garden.
Dwight: What are you growing here, bull crap?

Dwight: Who is Justice Beaver?
Jim: It's... a crime-fighting beaver.

Kevin will be eaten. Pam will be taken slave. Jim will be made a Warlord's jester. Meredith will be okay.

He cut the part where my circuit board malfunctioned? Then what was the point of spilling the drink on me?

Dwight: Do more stupid faces!
Kevin: Which one? I have a lot of stupid faces.

Michael: Boner Bomb starring Jason Statham. Or go against type with an Eisenberg or Michael Cera.
Dwight: Movie idea?
Michael: Noooo...Saving the world has never been this hard.

Dwight: And what is the hookup zone policy on masturbation?
Michael: Pro.

I can think like Michael. Alright, I'm deep below the ocean's surface in a submarine. A torpedo is coming right at me...No! Damn it! That's just my own imagination.

You drive. I got a car full of fox meat.

Problem solved everyone. Space Orphan and Princess Nincumpoop are off to rescue Michael.

The Office Quotes

Jan: All right, well are you gonna take care of this?
Michael: Yeppers.
Jan: What did I tell you about "yeppers?"
Michael: I don't... remember.
Jan: I told you not to say it. Do you remember that?
Michael: Yeesh...

Michael: I love you, Jan.
Jan: Okay.