Dwight: If you're ever in the area, you'll always have a place to stay...in my barn.
Jim: There it is.

Dwight: I can't believe you came.
Michael: That's what she said.

Jim: I think it's time for you to bury the hatchet.
Dwight: Waste of a good hatchet.

I never thought I'd say this, but I think I ate too much bone marrow.

Angela: The only people that need to be there are you and me.
Dwight: Oh and the old man to feed us the cheese that he's been fermenting since the day of my birth. You keep forgetting about him.

Dwight: You're a good assistant Jim.
Jim: Not as good as you.
Dwight: That's very true. Get the hell out of here.

Dwight: We're third cousins, which is great for bloodlines and isn't technically incest.
Jim: Right in the sweet spot.

The two of you would move to my 16 hundred acre estate, which let's face it, is a big step up from living in a gay man's closet.

Anyone who needs to speak to me has gotta go through me first.

Pete: Plop? Still?
Dwight: We owe Andy that much.

I'd like to get harmful steam, but the prices are absurd.

It's not the KGB, but it's a start.

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 634 in total

The Office Quotes

I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days before you've actually left them.

Andy

Robert: You want a three and a half day weekend for Columbus Day?
Andy: Yes I do.
Robert: And you are aware Columbus and his legions committed genocide against an entire civilization of Native Americans?
Andy: I don't care.

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