Dwight: If you're ever in the area, you'll always have a place to stay...in my barn.
Jim: There it is.

Dwight: I can't believe you came.
Michael: That's what she said.

Jim: I think it's time for you to bury the hatchet.
Dwight: Waste of a good hatchet.

I never thought I'd say this, but I think I ate too much bone marrow.

Angela: The only people that need to be there are you and me.
Dwight: Oh and the old man to feed us the cheese that he's been fermenting since the day of my birth. You keep forgetting about him.

Dwight: You're a good assistant Jim.
Jim: Not as good as you.
Dwight: That's very true. Get the hell out of here.

Dwight: We're third cousins, which is great for bloodlines and isn't technically incest.
Jim: Right in the sweet spot.

The two of you would move to my 16 hundred acre estate, which let's face it, is a big step up from living in a gay man's closet.

Anyone who needs to speak to me has gotta go through me first.

Pete: Plop? Still?
Dwight: We owe Andy that much.

I'd like to get harmful steam, but the prices are absurd.

It's not the KGB, but it's a start.

The Office Quotes

At least once a year, I like to bring in some of my Kevin's Famous Chili. The trick is to undercook the onions. Everybody is going to get to know each other in the pot. I'm serious about this stuff. I'm up the night before pressing garlic and dicing whole tomatoes. I toast my own Ancho chilies. It's a recipe passed down from Malones for generations. It's probably the thing I do best.

Kevin

Jan: All right, well are you gonna take care of this?
Michael: Yeppers.
Jan: What did I tell you about "yeppers?"
Michael: I don't... remember.
Jan: I told you not to say it. Do you remember that?
Michael: Yeesh...