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House: You're invoking the guy code?
Wilson: We're guys. It's a code.

Wilson: Can I talk to you for a second?
House: I'm interrogating a suspect.

Wilson: We're not gay!
Neighbor: Seriously?

Dr. Wilson: I'm not here for an argument, House.
House: No. Right. That's room 12A.

House: I'm ignoring you to make a point.
Dr. Wilson: The problem with that technique is I have no idea what point you're making.
House: That your idea is implicitly no worth listening to. Doubling your patient's chemo is stupid. Damn, now it's explicit.

House: I didn't realize you'd be in the middle of something.
Wilson: It's a conference room. With glass walls.

I just had a House moment... how cool is that?

Friend: I read somewhere that turkeys know what you're thinking.
Wilson: Then I should stop thinking about German porn.

House: He's a self-important jerk,
Wilson: Seems to be what I'm attracted to.

How you manage to elevate your narcissism to beneficence is masterful.

Dr. Wilson

House: I've decided what I'm going to do about Cuddy and Lucas. I'm going to break them up.
Dr. Wilson: Of course.
House: It's given me a purpose in life. A goal, a raison d'etre.
Dr. Wilson: Albeit a selfish, mean-spirited, childish raison
House: I think of it more as benevolent.

House: You think she'd send me to a vacant lot for Thanksgiving dinner?
Wilson: If she's smart.

Displaying quotes 61 - 72 of 127 in total

House Quotes

People don't get what they deserve. They just get what they get. There's nothing any of us can do about it.

House

House: Lift up your arms. You have a parasite.
Jill: Like a tapeworm or something?
House: Lie back and lift up your sweater. You can put your arms down.
Jill: Can you do anything about it?
House: Only for about a month or so. After that it becomes illegal to remove, except in a couple of states.
Jill: Illegal?
House: Don't worry. Many women learn to embrace this parasite. They name it, dress it up in tiny clothes, arrange playdates with other parasites...
Jill: Playdates...
House: (showing her sonogram) It has your eyes.

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