I can understand your confusion. I ate a baby for lunch today.

[To Dr. Park] You have to give him something he values more than honor. And you should update your resume.

The thing is House, I don't like you.

Wilson: You're forging my name on prescriptions again.
House: No. Because what you just said implied I stopped.

Dr. Wilson: You're an ass.
House: What, for trying to walk on a freshly mangled leg? Performing surgery on myself? For thinking I could solve my emotional problems with rat medicine? If you're gonna nag, at least have the decency to be specific.

Somehow in your knee-jerk, juvenile way, you tripped and fell into an actual adult response to this.

Disgusting beasts. I don't know why I ever agreed to this bet.

You're a lot of things, House, but you've never been a sadist. You're pummeling an opponent who isn't fighting back.

Dr. Wilson: We are gonna talk about this, and we're gonna deal with this.
House: So I have no choice. Fine. Unless... unless... yes, I do. I do have legs. I see you didn't factor those into your brilliant plan.

Dr. Wilson: Maybe... talk to someone.
House: Already scheduled.
Dr. Wilson: Really?
House: I'm not an idiot. I know I need help.
Dr. Wilson: Okay. That's... great. I meant, like, a counselor.
House: I know.
Dr. Wilson: But you meant a hooker.
House: Yeah. baby steps.

Wilson: She told me you had taken a Vicodin.
House: And then I took A lot more.

I was going to send Chase to tell you what the obvious right thing to do is here is, but then I realized that if you were too stupid to know how stupid that was, you might miss the irony.

Dr. Wilson
Displaying quotes 13 - 24 of 127 in total

House Quotes

People don't get what they deserve. They just get what they get. There's nothing any of us can do about it.

House

So, you're saying... you want a prenup. In liquid form.

Dr. Chase (to Cameron)
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