Father: The Lord handles surveillance here at St. Angelus.
Danny: Well, you've got me on that one, Father.

Danny: What did you tell her, Mom? That all of us cops are stupid and you're such a genius?
Erin: Yeah, basically.

Danny: We just took a statement from a 6'4" transsexual escort who thinks her Labradoodle was dognapped by her Shrink. How could I not be having fun right now? I'm telling you Jack, they can keep Central Park and Times Square. This is the New York that I love. The one you never see on a post card.
Jackie: Now there's an untapped market, tranihooker postcards.

I was getting ready to call in a missing persons on you. No worries. Victim's still dead.

Jackie: It was either St. Anne's tartan plaid or a chastity belt.
Danny: I'm guessing by the age of her daughter it wasn't the chastity belt that she chose

No, it makes sense. In some dark, gloomy, Russian type of way.

Clerk: We use that for our accounting.
Danny: Well, Best Buy's having a sale. Get yourself a new one.

Danny: The good son, huh?
Kevin: There's one in every Irish family.
Danny: True.

Frank: Be careful. If he's anything like his old man...
Danny: If I'm anything like my old man, he's the one that better be careful.

Danny: I swear if I have to look at one more businessman with a wheelie getting off an elevator I'm going to eat my gun.
Jackie: Shoot me first, please. It'd be a mercy killing.

Jackie: This guy's going to miss his maid in Rikers.
Danny: He may end up being somebody's maid in Rikers.

Hey Dad. The Batmobile just showed up.