Modern Family

Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABC
Modern family
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Sometimes I worry nobody's going to like Alex.

I know it's stupid, but it's nice to know that sometimes you'll fight for me and all I have to do is laugh at some other guy's story.

Phil: All over YouTube.
Claire: It went viral.
Phil: Some sicko auto-tunned me.

Luke: You yelled at my teacher for calling me special.
Claire: Hunnie that wasn't a compliment.

The way we compete with each other is sick! Two 13-year-olds knew how to take advantage of us.

Claire: I assure you, you are fine.
Phil: That's very comforting coming from a marketing major at a party school.

Honey don't you think it's weird that one of your friends is an 80-year-old man?

Claire: Oh thank God, here comes Phil and the butterball.
Manny: Hey, I have a name!!

Listen to me, your whole life has led to this moment. All the training, the hours of dedication, there's not a soul alive that can touch you when it comes to shopping and baby you know it. Look at me, be you!

Phil: If I had a son I'd want him to be like Kenneth.
Claire: You do have a son.

Mitchell is turning Gloria into mom.

Haley: Did my 3rd grade teacher say I have ADD or something.
Claire: No honey she said you couldn't A-D-D because she also knew you couldn't S-P-E-L-L.

Displaying quotes 73 - 84 of 171 in total

Modern Family Quotes

It's a body spray called Sex Grenade. One of the divorced dad's in the hotel recommended it.

Luke

I get that Thanksgiving is an big day for families that don't see each other, but we're together nonstop.

Jay