I knew it. Mercedes was cloned.
I don't smell raspberry hair gel. Does anyone know where Blaine Warbler is?
[to Santana] I'm glad you came back to play Rizzo. I feel bad for Mercedes but if her parents want her to be a boy, then I don't know, I guess it makes sense.
Santana: Let's just do the mature thing here. This is not an official break up. But let's just be honest that long distance relationships are almost impossible to maintain because both people are rarely getting what they need, especially at our age.
Brittany: This sounds a lot like a break up to me.
Wow. Sad songs make me really sad and I don't want to be sad.
Brittany: Being left behind sucks.
Santana: It's just a stupid prank.
Brittany: You don't get it. You left me behind and it hurt.
Brittany: Ah, young love.
Blaine: Do you remember when you started dating Santana and I started dating Kurt back before everyone was so busy and far away and things were so much simpler? We had so much more hope and innocence. Every day was just like Valentine's Day.
Brittany: We're still young. Shouldn't we still be experiencing those things?
Blaine: Brittany S. Pierce in her last term accomplished absolutely nothing except plan a dinosaur-themed prom and ban the use of hair gel. Ladies and gentlemen, telling anyone what they can or can't put in their hair is disgusting. It's tyranny, my friends. Next thing you know, they'll start burning books. And then they'll probably start burning people, too.
Brittany: That's a lie.
Artie: I mean, it's no secret that a woman loves a man in power, and don't take this personally, but before I graduate I would like to have a relationship that lasts longer than a couple weeks.
Brittany: Why would I take that personally?
Artie: You and I dated.
Brittany: We did?
Kurt: He hasn't called you because he loves you, not because he's forgotten about you. Your freedom is a gift he's given you--accept it.
Rachel: It's just so much freedom all at once it's starting to feel like loneliness.
Kurt: The only cure for loneliness is cake.
Brittany, take a seat. This is clearly the plan of an idiot. But a plan, nonetheless, and one that required the barest modicum of human logic, which frankly I thought was beyond you.Sue
Sam: I know what you're up to. Lip-syncing, beating up Jacob Ben Israel. You're intentionally hitting rock bottom.
Brittany: So I can make a glorious comeback just like Britney. I mean, look at her. She got paid $14 million dollars to be on X Factor, she looks great, and she has an amazing perfume you can smell from miles away. No matter what happened to her, she just came back stronger.
Sam: Consider this the last stop on the Train Wreck Express--an intervention.