Abby: Is this an order?
Vance: Yes! Go be a bad guy!

Abby: This is my nightmare! The only thing missing is Vance riding in on demon wings to fire me!
Torres: Well, that makes sense.
Abby: I usually wake up when his mustache turns into a snake.

Quinn [about a formerly broken plate]: How’d you get rid of the crack?
Abby [innocently]: Crack? What crack?

Abby: They're Navy rats.
Reeves: Officers or enlisted?

I love animals, but I think I'd love my husband more.

Abby: Gibbs, I can't have a conversation by myself!
Gibbs: It's never stopped you before.

I don't kick down doors. Are you saying I'm not a crime fighter?

Abby: Hey Tony.
McGee: Vance got a call.
Tony: Ziva. Are we sure?
McGee: I'm so sorry, Tony.

Abby: I just have something I need to tell you before you go.
Tony: How do you know I'm going?
Abby: Because I'm Abby Sciuto and I know things.
Tony: Why did I ask?
Abby: I know how much Ziva really loved you. And I need to know that you know that too.
Tony: I do. I think.
Abby: Don't think. Know. I know. She told me. I'm really going to miss you, Anthony DiNozzo.
Tony: Not half as much as I'm going to miss you, Abby Sciuto.

Abby: McGee, I want to celebrate that you can light up a room as fast as you can ping a phone.
McGee: Well thanks!
Abby: Hashtag: living rocks.
Gibbs: Hashtag get to the point.
Abby: Oh my God, Gibbs. You just used the word hashtag in a sentence

Senior: They took her fingerprints and I'm hoping that Abby can find a match.
Tony: Dad that's very commendable but you can't ask Abby to break agency rules for a personal favor.
Abby: We got a hit.
Tony: You ran the prints?
Abby: Of course, I did, Tony. Poor homeless woman in need of medical care? That's a no-brainer.

Tony: Okay but I guess I won't be able to tell you the middle name McGee's been holding out on us.
Abby: Farragut.
Tony: Does everybody know?

NCIS Quotes

Well tie me up and call me Loretta.

Fornell

‘You think you’re alone in the dark. Close your eyes. Remember everything good.’ My mom said that to me just before she died. Smart lady.

Gibbs