Lem: We don't create evil things. Ted: Some might see this long-range people-skinning laser as evil-ish. Phil: Well, that was only designed so you could peel an orange in your kitchen while sitting comfortably in your living room. Ted: Well, now it's used to peel enemy soldiers overseas while you sit comfortably in the Pentagon.
Ted: And listen. The Germans are all worried because, ironically, they think that Veridian is ruthlessly efficient and bent on world domination. Phil: Wow. That's like when those Irish auditors thought our accounting department drank too much and wrote overly depressing poetry