Stewart Gilligan "Stewie" Griffin is the beloved talking one-year-old baby on Family Guy. Stewie is the youngest son of Peter and Lois Griffin and is voiced by Seth McFarlane.
Stewie is bent on world domination... and killing his mother who seems completely oblivious to his attempts. He is also constantly wrestling with his homosexuality... even though he's only one.
Stewie: Brian, this is painful. It's like listening to those two foreign guys down at the coffee shop who've been living in the US almost long enough to sound American.
(scene cuts to coffee shop)
Guy #1: Oh man, what a good bunch of partying at that disco-tech. They played one of my audience requests.
Guy #2: Way awesome! I myself drank like five liters of beer. Any more and I would have ended up in hospital man.
Guy #1: Oh you said it friend, but I wanted to stay, because I almost had sex on this girl.
Guy #2: Oh yeah, but it was so expensive. Each drink was like six dollars forty!
(Brian and Stewie sitting at table)Brian: So what happened?Stewie: Well, you wanna know what I learned this week? Being a grown-up sucks. Women, Brian...what a royal pain in the ass. It's like, it's like, why can't you just hang out with guys, you know? Just live with someone of your own sex. Just do what you would do with women, but with your buddy, you know? Why don't guys just do that?Brian: They do, it's called being gay.Stewie: Oh, that's what gay is? Oh yeah, I could totally get into that.