Ned Flanders is Homer's neighbor and worst friend on The Simpsons. Ned is a devout Christian and more or less a perfect human being. Ned lost his wife to a freak NASCAR-related injury and is forced to raise his sons, Rod and Tod alone. Ned has proven to be quite the eligible bachelor as a successful business owner (of the Leftorium) and in suprisingly good shape.
I'm not thinking straight, why did I have that wine cooler last month?Ned
Rod: We thought you were gonna die.
Tod: And then Uncle Kevin would have to raise us.
Rod: And his funny friend, David.
Ned Flanders: Oh I'd put rocks in your pocket and walk you out to sea for before I'd let that happen.