Ed O'Neil plays Jay, the patriarch on ABC's Modern Family.  Jay is a guys' guy who's in a bit of a mid-life crisis and has re-married a woman, Gloria, who is much much much younger than him.  Good for Jay.

Jay Pritchett Quotes

By the way, do not look up peeing games on the internet.

Jay

First rule of golf, shhh.

Jay

Modern Family Quotes

By the way, do not look up peeing games on the internet.

Jay

You're like a mob wife. You complain about what I do, but have no problem wearing the fur that fell off the back of the truck.

Mitchell