Bones Review: Mystery Meat

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I hate to say it, but I think the move to Fridays is most definitely a nail in the Bones coffin. I know there are those who'll keep hope alive that this series will withstand yet another season, but really, the end is nigh. It's time to prepare.

Do we really want more PSAs and gross-out moments with stewed humans and bacon-flavored sexual lubricants? Do we need more of Brennan's flailing about in a biker bar while proclaiming it a mating ritual? 

No, no we don't. But that's what Bones Season 9 Episode 10 gave us. And then some.

Brennan's Bachelorette Party

I'm not even really going to touch on the murder of the week because if I do, I'll be forced to relive every can of beef stew I've ever consumed in my 30+ years of life and while that number isn't astronomically high, it's high enough that I really don't want to consider the possibility that human meat--or horse meat--could've been hidden inside or I'll fall into a spiral of disgust, both with myself and the food industry. 

I've read The Jungle, thank you very much.

This case just...ugh. The bacon-flavored lube? Really? I feel an anti-bacon rant bubbling up and I love bacon. But enough's enough. It's time to put that pig out to pasture and stop with it already.

While Oliver and Daisy worked the case the sexual tension between the two of them mounted. They'll be the next on-screen pairing and it'll somehow throw Sweets into a tailspin that Daisy's moving on while he's playing Three's Company with his hot psychiatrist roommates. It's all so forced and yet, I kind of like Oliver if only because, instead of coddling Daisy, he puts her in her place.

[to Daisy] Your need for attention is exhausting.



Daisy: You should have seen this, Oliver, but you were expending too much effort trying to undermine me.
Oliver: I assure you that takes no effort whatsoever.

Knocking her down a peg or two somehow makes her more bearable. But just slightly. She's still my least-favorite squint for all the reasons Oliver articulated and then some, but hey, there's someone for everybody, right?

Even all the bikers in the biker bar with their biker girls.

The idea of Angela taking Brennan out for a bachelorette party had the potential to be hilarious and funny, and for a time it was.

Watching the girls walk into the biker bar thinking it was a country-western bar and dressed accordingly and then deciding to stick around anyway and make the most of it was great. Then they started drinking and winning money and doing whatever it was Cam did with her drink and having a great time.

And then Brennan started dancing. Unless she's dancing with Booth, she just shouldn't dance.

The moment when an all-out bar fight erupted and it was the five of them against all the other people in the bar was the moment I checked out on that scene. It wasn't funny. It wasn't even hyperbolically humorous. It was just ridiculous.

What was not ridiculous was watching Booth care for a very drunk Brennan when she came stumbling home. 

He's a man in love and it shows.

Everything about Booth screams "happily married man!" I like it. I also like that, for the time being, Brennan remains relatively unchanged by the fact that they're married aside from feeling a little extra weight on her left hand. That fits with the character who eschewed marriage in the first place. 

The one thing that left me most confused was Angela and Booth's mending of the fences. Didn't they do that already?

Didn't Angela forgive him for the whole calling-off-the-wedding-because-Pelant-is-psychotic thing back when she, oh, I don't know, threw them a wedding?

Maybe tonight was about Booth forgiving Angela, in which case, they shouldn't have shown her apologizing again. But I get the feeling that this was still Angela who had the problem with Booth based solely on her Jealous Judy face in Brennan's office. 

Angela has been pushing these two together for how many seasons now and she's suddenly indignant that she would fall below Booth in terms of order of importance in Brennan's life? Excuse me, what?

I just didn't understand that at all and I really, truly hope they're moving past it. They hugged it out. Let's bury the hatchet, you two.

What did you think of Bones Season 9 Episode 10? Did this case make you rethink everything you've ever eaten? Are you rooting for an Oliver/Daisy hookup? Did you also think Angela forgave Booth a few episodes ago?

The Mystery in the Meat Review

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Miranda Wicker is a Staff Writer for TV Fanatic. Follow her on Twitter.

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Bones Season 9 Episode 10 Quotes

Angela: There's this country-western bar outside of town. It's got this bull that we can ride, and there's line dancing, and there's these hot guys in chaps, and some of them aren't even gay.
Brennan: I do like horses so I will feel very comfortable there.

Booth: Are you saying he came in a can?
Brennan: Most definitely.
Caroline: This is why I only buy free-range.